Poor Gaga

Poor Lady Gaga...she got electrocuted at a recent show. Okay, maybe just electrocuted virtually via Youtube. I love Youtube user edits. They're my favorite. I love the way their minds work. It takes some time to put together a good edit and I just want to let all of you guys know that I appreciate your hard work. You can take a hammy performance by Gaga and turn it into a grand masterpiece. Here are a couple of my other favorite edits: Full House, Star Trek. And this edit showcases the best parts of this amazingly awesome, Oscar-worthy movie.

-Lolski

Obama is a wax statue

I came across this video detailing the day of pictures Obama took at the UN meeting last week. I've come to the conclusion that they had a wax statue stand-in for him for pictures. The real Obama was miles away screaming "Suck it, foreign leaders!". I wish I had a wax statue of him in my apartment. We'd have a jolly good time. I would bring him everywhere....meetings, school, Wal-Mart. Though we'd have to avoid certain places like saunas and hot tubs. People and Okay magazine would do a story about us. The headline would be "Obama seen Canoodling in Canada". Pretty soon Michelle would knock on my door and tell me to quit it. I'd have to grudgingly relent after taking one look at her mighty biceps.

-Lolski

A Handbaaag??!!!

Where has this been all of my life? I sat replaying this for 15 minutes. The last syllable turns into a song and changes octaves. This is the equivalence of a "Well I never!". The only thing missing is a monacle.

Either this is the best thing on the Internets or my standards have been falling to dangerously low levels of late. Once is not good enough...it must be replayed a minimum of 10 times. Legend has it that this is from a line in a movie based on Oscar Wilde's play The Importance of Being Earnest. Whatever it is...it has struck a very powerful chord in me and will never lose it's allure no matter how many times I play it.

A HANDBAAG???!!!!

-Lolski

British Animals

Adding a British accent to anything makes it seem both sophisticated and funny. I wish I had a British accent inner monologue. My thoughts would be so entertaining. I don't know if I'd prefer a man British voice or a lady. They are equally appealing I guess. As long as it said "quite" and "dodgy" a lot, I'd be happy. The only British voice I find annoying is dang Keira Knightley. Wait maybe it's not her voice and just her face. If she pouts one more time in a movie and gives that dumb, looking off in the distance, trying to be sultry look one more time, I'm gonna lose my shit. No joke, Keira. Enough. You make every movie you are in unenjoyable to watch simply because of this pout. Don't get me started on those Pirates of the Carribean movies.

Here is a series of videos from a British TV series "Walk on the Wild Side". I was rofling so hard I think I might have peed a little during the Allan/Steve one. I bet my cat would sound a lot like Emma Watson, the one that plays Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter movies, if she were British.

- Lolski

Unsexy Werewolf

Want to see a crazy woman dance in a unitard? I sure do. I saw Shakira's new video for "She Wolf" the other day and yeah...interesting. I actually quietly chuckled the whole way through. Shakira's a hot chick and usually has killer moves that make boys get funny feelings in their special places. I have a feeling this video will confuse the boys. Much in the same way Lady Gaga confuses them. Is Gaga sexy, is she not? One can't know that for certain.

One thing I do know for certain is Shakira has become a mutant. Her tendons and connective tissue appear to have changed since "Hips Don't Lie". They can now stretch and move in ways only Mr. Fantastic can. She also appears to have utilized the same choreographer as Beyonce. Ladies: Spastic does not equal sexy. Stick with the tried and true booty shake.




Sony won't let me embed the video so click here if you want to see ShakiWolf. Maybe this video will help resurrect the wolf sweatshirt? One can only hope...



- Lolski

Alcoholic Monkeys!

These poor little monkeys have taken a liking to the sauce. Who can blame them really? I love a good cocktail.

They're quick little buggers too! Let them try to take my cocktail away and they'll see they've met their match. I keep one eyeball on my booze at all times. I'm not gonna lie...these little guys remind me of people I know. I'm not naming any names hehe.

The Appendix that Cried Wolf...

So according to a recent news story, this poor dude got his appendix removed twice in the same month:

Mark Wattson, from Swindon, Wilts, had two appendectomies in a month after doctors failed to remove the appendix at the first attempt.

He claims that he lost his job because his employers did not believe that he needed to have the operation twice.

Mr Wattson, 35, had his first appendectomy on Tuesday, July 7, after being told that his appendix was the cause of abdominal pain he had suffered for several months.

He said that doctors informed him that the procedure had gone well. He was discharged the next day.

Yet a month later, Mr Wattson was taken to hospital after collapsing in Swindon town centre.

He was told by doctors at Great Western Hospital – where his original operation had taken place – that his appendix had burst and that he needed an emergency appendectomy.

He was readmitted for surgery and released following the second – successful – operation on August 9.

"I couldn't believe what I was hearing," Mr Wattson said. "I told these people I had my appendix out just four weeks earlier but there it was on the screen for all to see.

"I thought: 'What the hell did they slice me open for in the first place'?"

Source

What did they remove the first time you ask Mark? Excellent question. Somewhere a doctor is smacking his head and saying "Oooh...you said appendix. Right. See, I thought you said spleen. Spleen rhymes with mean and the patient was being mean to me before surgery. Oh dang...my memory trick didn't work at all. Shit, I always mess up on Fridays. Boy is my face red."

- Lolski

Clowns!... Clowns!.... Clowns!

Okay, be prepared to be creeped out. Think...dash of the IT clown mixed with a fresh dollup of Carrot Top. Sometimes I feel like the Internetz need to take a vacation for a few weeks. Like, it's time to put the breaks on this whole web 2.0 movement for a wee minute. Were these weirdos lurking about in the 1700's? Aaah... riiiight...they sure were. Case in point.

Okay, so it's not that creepy weirdies weren't around, they just didn't have a forum. Thanks Internet for giving us all a niche.

- Lolski

Melancholy Kitty

Awww poor kitty! Bath time is sad time. I almost rofled my pants when I saw this. The music and lighting paired with the silent meows of a very morose but clean kitty cat makes this haunting docu-drama a must see (I sure gave Roeper a run for his money with that review!). This makes for a very Oscar-worthy viral cat video. Don't worry, despite the many shades of melancholic gloom, there is a happy and dry ending for this pitiful puss...

Crazy Dog with a Weird Phobia

So this is my parents neurotic dog. He has many odd phobias and is afraid of seemingly innocuous objects. This video depicts one of his many irrational fears...

- Lolski

The Cucumber Capers

This recent news item is a real whodunnit. I'm going to assume they have small backyards or live in apartments.

Adelaide cops baffled by cucumber thefts - August 12, 2009

A spate of cucumber thefts has Adelaide police in a pickle.

More than $10,000 worth of cucumbers have been stolen in 11 separate robberies in the past three months.

Thieves have targeted market gardens north of Adelaide, with police saying the latest robbery - of 50 bags of cucumbers - was reported from a glasshouse at Virginia at the weekend.

"The issue with the cucumber is how do you and I tell who owns a different cucumber?," SA Police Chief Inspector Kym Zander told ABC Radio on Wednesday.

"We're having difficulty establishing where they (the cucumbers) are going."

Source

It's the perfect crime...virtually traceless. If the thieves were really smart, they'd get into the upper echelons of vegetable marauding. We're talkin' avocados, organic cauliflower and grunions. Grunions are the rarest type of onions in the world. They are a hybrid of the yellow Spanish onion and the Argentinian Granadilla. They are sought after for their pungent flavors and aromatic skins. Okay all of that about the grunion was made up. I just like saying that word...grunion. In truth, not jest, the most expensive vegetable is said to be the asparagus because we only use the stems. That's one to grow on ;)

- Lolski

Best song and video in the World

This song will be sure to move quickly up the charts. I suspect it will win a Grammy in the near future. I could listen to it on repeat for hours. Little known fact: all songwriter's have cat shadow-writers. Virtually all music today is actually originally created by domesticated animals. All of Soulja Boy's music is composed by his shorthair tabby named "Supasoaka".

- Lolski

Another one to haunt your dreamscapes

If you thought the zebra man was creepy, the doberman will take you to new heights of bizarro land. It reminds me of one of those scary Egyptian Gods/Aliens from Stargate. No wonder these videos are tagged as "potentially" inappropriate on Youtube. This is a man that is "potentially" a serial killer. First he'll paint himself, then he'll say to you "It puts the paint on it's body or else it gets the hose again"...

- Lolski

So I Married An Eiffel Tower

I came across this video the other day in my daily internet rummaging. It's from a documentary about people that are in love with objects like buildings, bridges, national monuments. These people actually legally marry the buildings they are in love with. They call themselves Objectum Sexuals. There are two ladies that are both in love with the Berlin wall. I'd like to see how that cat fight plays out.

"He was mine first!"

"Get outta my way biotch, he's mine."

Then they both realize he's a deadbeat and no one wants him around anymore anyways and they move on to greener pastures like local Walmarts and McDonalds buildings. There's lots of their love to go around ladies.

- Lolski

I've dreamed of doing this...

This dude just did what I've always dreamed of doing during a meeting or job interview. Lmaoface.

- Lolski

Something out of my nightmares...

Okay I saw this and got so creeped out. It's like some type of zebra reverse centaur. This creeps me out almost as much as those dang centaurs in the Chronicle of Narnia movies. Okay fine, I admit it. I'm prejudiced against Mermen and the like. Stay in the sea Merman...stay in the sea....

- Lolski

Quantum Weirdness

Okay so I'm a nerd. I love science, technology etc. I read a lot about quantum theory. Some of that stuff will blow your mind. It will have your head spinning like a top. It will literally knock your keister off kilter. Okay enough of that.

If you don't know about the double-slit experiment (sounds dirty but it's not), then feast your eyes on this. Let Dr. Quantum break it down for ya...

- Lolski

Worst/best rap battle ever?

So this is one of my old favs and if you haven't seen Eli yet then...uh...basically you need to. This is known as the worst rap battle ever. But I say pshaw to that! How about best rap battle ever. I wish I could put Eli in my pocket and take him wherever I go! The heart swipe is also probably the best camera effect known to man. Wait for Eli...he's after the first dude.

-Lolski

Twilight fans get serious at a "Twilight" tour

So Twilight fans are crazy over Edward and company at a Twi-tour. I myself am obsessed with the series and would for sure go to some type of event if I could and stalk Robert Pattinson. Would I take it as far as these folks below? Probably not. This is the point when reality and fantasy blur and you are forcing your boyfriend to give longing, sultry looks into the camera.

- Lolski

I love this lil wippersnipper!

So I came across this lil guy's videos and he's the funniest. He's a 16 year old kid with progeria. It's that really rare disease where the kid's age super fast. Extremely sad yes. But this lil guy's got moxy! He's a foul-mouthed firecracker! He makes video's where he raps and dances and tells dirty jokes. He's got more confidence in one of his little knobby knees then most adults do altogether. Ofcourse there are d-bags that make fun on youtube, it IS the internet. But he seems to take it all in stride. I LOVE HIM!!

-Lolski