Best Love Advice Ever!

If you've never seen Fred and Sharon, well then you must. They are a kooky Canadian couple that provide free love advice to all the celebrities in Hollywood. And they do so using the latest in animation technology to boot. I dare you to find better animation and graphics!

Jennifer Aniston needs to hire these guys so she can land herself a relationship that sticks. She bothers me for some reason and I just can't put my finger on why. Maybe it's her endless array of ridiculously good movies. And would it kill her to play a role that doesn't involve a woman desperate to find love? She's only feeding into the stereotypes. Always a leading lady and never a bride. Ouch. I'm probably just jealous because I would kill to be Brad's ex-wife. Maybe Brangelina would adopt me and let me live in their pool house? I've got big plans....big plans I tells ya.

-Lolski

Poor Gaga

Poor Lady Gaga...she got electrocuted at a recent show. Okay, maybe just electrocuted virtually via Youtube. I love Youtube user edits. They're my favorite. I love the way their minds work. It takes some time to put together a good edit and I just want to let all of you guys know that I appreciate your hard work. You can take a hammy performance by Gaga and turn it into a grand masterpiece. Here are a couple of my other favorite edits: Full House, Star Trek. And this edit showcases the best parts of this amazingly awesome, Oscar-worthy movie.

-Lolski

What do I gotta do?

Do I gotta get water from the moon? Nasa recently announced that astronauts have confirmed the discovery of water on the moon. Pretty cool news if you ask me. There is one person, however, for whom this news does not bode well. Somewhere deep in the heart of a Las Vegas condo, Celine Dion is on her knees screaming "Noooooooo, I curse thee Nasa!". With this recent news, Celine's early 90's hit Water from the Moon is now defunct. Sorry Celine, next time you might wanna change it to Dark Matter from Andromeda.

So, essentially, before this discovery, water on the moon was the equivalent of When Pigs Fly. So, I can therefore look forward to the day when pigs can be found perched on trees and fire escapes. No more bacon for anyone. :(

- Lolski

Gimme maah pizza!

Yeah, so Jim Breuer is a douche. I thought he'd be cool because he was on SNL and was the funny stoned hippy in Half Baked. But noooo, he's an actual douche bag. Here he is doing a commercial for Pizza Hut and he flips out on a prop guy because he wants to take a bite out of the pizza. Prop guy doesn't want that to happen and hijincks ensue. I guess prop guy is kind of douchey too. It's an all round douchey situation.

Unsexy Werewolf

Want to see a crazy woman dance in a unitard? I sure do. I saw Shakira's new video for "She Wolf" the other day and yeah...interesting. I actually quietly chuckled the whole way through. Shakira's a hot chick and usually has killer moves that make boys get funny feelings in their special places. I have a feeling this video will confuse the boys. Much in the same way Lady Gaga confuses them. Is Gaga sexy, is she not? One can't know that for certain.

One thing I do know for certain is Shakira has become a mutant. Her tendons and connective tissue appear to have changed since "Hips Don't Lie". They can now stretch and move in ways only Mr. Fantastic can. She also appears to have utilized the same choreographer as Beyonce. Ladies: Spastic does not equal sexy. Stick with the tried and true booty shake.




Sony won't let me embed the video so click here if you want to see ShakiWolf. Maybe this video will help resurrect the wolf sweatshirt? One can only hope...



- Lolski

Mystery of the Bees Solved

Scientists have recently found some clues to explain the disappearance of honey bees in the U.S. We didn't need fancy sciencing to tell us why they left. We've had the answer in our midst all along. Here is the true cause of their mass disappearance:



If you don't know who these dingbats are, consider yourself lucky. The bees finally decided enough is enough. Heidi Montag's recent "performance" on Miss Universe sealed the deal. Her dance moves created ultrasonic vibrations, signalling the bees to haul ass while there was still time. If they were smart they'd take up residency in Fiji or somewhere extremely remote where they will never be subjected to them again.

- Lolski

I've dreamed of doing this...

This dude just did what I've always dreamed of doing during a meeting or job interview. Lmaoface.

- Lolski

Chris Brown reads a teleprompter

Soooo Chris Dinkus Brown is begging us all to buy his albums again. He has finally publicly apologized for beating Rihanna's face in. I believe him...I believe everything celebrities tell me 'cause they are better then all of us. They poop pure solid gold bricks. Imagine scientists got the same amount of fame for doing real work? The dude's at the Hadron Collider would have mad groupies. "Oh Dr. So and So...is that a particle accelerator in your pocket? Oh wait, no. You're just happy to see me"

- Lolski

Who's tryin' to hurt my Brit Brit???

Some Russian dudes are making death threats to my Brit Brit....

Do they know who they are dealing with??? I've got a mind to go down there and tell them what's what. We can have a dance off. And Brit will be the judge. And unicorns will referee. And Madonna will provide sideline entertainment with constant crotch unitard yoga poses. T'will be grand....

- Lolski

All aaaah do is smoke weed.

So here's a sweet lil gem my friend showed me this weekend. How did I miss this for so long? I have to get back on the ball maaaaan. In case you're wondering who the guy is...he's the funny stalker dude from Talladega Nights. Everyday...weed.

- Lolski